Have you ever asked the question what if? It's deep if you go there. Tread lightly with these two very heavy words. I mean, think about it, really think about it. What if....
What if I had not worked a job since I was 14 years old...
What if I had made the cheer squad that year...
What if I didn't buy a car my senior year...
What if I didn't choose to work EVERY weekend my junior/senior years....
I wouldn't have met Darrell. (what if I wouldn't have given him that one chance?)
What if I had finished nursing school...
What if I had gotten a killer job right out of high school...
Then I wouldn't have the job I have now, I wouldn't know the people I know now.
I wouldn't be the same person.
What if I had said no...
What if I wanted someone with lots of money...
What if I didn't marry for love...
What if I wanted more THINGs in life...
What if I would've said NO to International adoption...
What if Darrell and I saw color...
I wouldn't have my sweet Emy and my precious Luke. (what if I had turned them down just because they were considered "delayed" and "weren't perfect"?) My mind can't get around that one---it's just scary.
What if I didn't believe in miracles...
What if God had given up on me...
What if people around me weren't praying for miracles in our lives...
What if I believed in abortion...
I wouldn't have gotten to experience life within me.
I wouldn't have my Tessa.
What if we have moved to the beach that year...
What if we didn't live where we do...
My children would not get to see their grandparents every weekend--such a sad thought.
All of the what ifs in the world just don't add up for me. God chose to bless me with this family, these children, and all I had to do was accept it. What if? That question will never be answered, but I really don't care. I love my life. I love my family. God loves us and sent His son Jesus to die in my place. What more do I need?
I have more than enough, don't ya think?
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Emy Annette Durba, Luke McCoy Swarnadip, Tessa Renae Christina
Please read our blog--we share with you our journey as a family--a blog about us, mostly our children. We have been married for 18 years! Emy joined our family in 2004 and Luke came home in 2008. Tessa is our "homemade surprise baby". She was born Nov 2010.
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Emy Annette Durba, Luke McCoy Swarnadip, Tessa Renae Christina
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6 comments:
Hey Cindy,
It's good to hear from you! I was hoping the storms down there didn't affect you.
We both have so much to be thankful for . . . Happy Mother's Day to you!
Nancy
Dear Cindy
I am a Google blogger too (oneyearbibleblogentry.blogspot.com)and hit "next blog" and up came yours! And no wonder, my wife and I too are adoptive parents and Christians (African-American, not international). I get the what ifs - you say them in a way that is grateful, not remorseful, "what if" but not "if only". As Ricky Skaggs sings, "Hallelujah, that's a work of love." I say my wife and I "are" - but really it is "were" - she passed into glory three months ago, I have a blog about her too. She would have loved getting together with you! I think the link for that is dianepagememories.blogspot.com, if you want to see it.
Meanwhile thank you for your thoughts and photos, good to see others "out there" who are of like mind and faith.
Guy, from Vermont
What if's can be a bit scary if you think about it....
That's really beautiful!I've thought those things one too many times..!!
love your family definitely from God. God bless sms
Love your family blog,It is very nice.
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